Job hunt

This is the last week of school for the summer. I know that Dakota will looove not having to go to school. My brother's girlfriend Jami will be out of school as well which means that I won't be needing to watch Adrian every day. I don't think we can afford for me to not be making any money (besides the digital scrapkits I sell online), so I'm now looking for a job. I got an application from Nodaway Valley Bank and took it back today. I was having John help me word some stuff because he is better at that than I am. He's just really good at B.S. There was a part on the application about my past jobs and what I liked or disliked about them. John wouldn't let me put that I hated having to work with customers at Coach House or complain about the cum stains on the beds at the Comfort Inn. He is just no fun. When I took the application back, I gave it to the lady that I think is the head teller. Instead of asking me if I had any banking experience, she asked me if I was related to anyone that worked at the bank and she wanted to know which Mackey boy I was married to. The saying, "It's not what you know, it's who you know" is so true. Luckily, she knows John's mom and John's moms' cousin works at the bank. John's grandma used to work there and John's grandpa used to be Vice President (I think). So, I know people. That might get me an interview. But it's the interview part where I shoot myself in the foot. I can fake my "comfort level". But with having social anxiety, I can't fake being a perky people person. Trust me, I try when I need to but when I talk to someone for a long time (like during an interview), I'm guessing they can see through it all. That, and my mind just goes blank a lot. I was really nervous just to walk in to get the application and to return it. I might hyperventilate if they actually call me for an interview. Under "job applying for" I should have said to put me in a corner somewhere and give me lots of paperwork to do.

Today was the Kindergarten picnic at the park. Parents were invited to come so John, Mikayla, and I went. At the beginning, we all sat under shade trees eating. John got pooped on by a bird, ha ha ha ha ha. It was only like, 3 inches from me. That kind of stuff usually happens to me but it didn't this time. It was great :) Lucky for John, I brought baby wipes. Anyway, Dakota didn't even play with anybody. I asked him if he wanted to go play with someone but he said he was too shy. Mikayla had a lot of fun at first. After awhile she suddenly got upset and started crying. She said she was tired and needed her pacifier. Yes, she is 3 and yes, we still let her use her pacifier for naps/bedtime. We had Dakota off of the pacifier by the time he turned 3. I used to be a member of a parenting forum online, and another mother was saying how disgusting it is to see 2 and 3 year olds with pacifiers. Other parents can be soooo judgmental and mean. I started feeling like a bad mother and that's what made me take the pacifier away from Dakota when I did. Mikayla isn't so easy. Once we tried cutting back on it, she started wanting it more and more. In fact, she is crying as I type this because she wants it. She is just so stuck on that thing. Anyway, back to the picnic - after Mikayla started bawling I decided I would just take her home so she could take a nap. John was going to stay with Dakota but Dakota begged to go home too. We asked his teacher if he could go ahead and go, it wasn't like he was going to be doing anything the rest of the day anyway. She said that was fine, and she called over to the school and had them sign him out in the office. There were some flies around and I wonder if that was part of the reason Dakota wanted to leave. It doesn't matter what kind of insect it is, he is terrified of them all. So, we all went home and we all went to sleep. It was nice.