Stuff, stuff, and more stuff

So, I went to my appt. with the psychologist yesterday. I hate going there. Every time I go, they ask me a series of annoying questions. No, I don't have homicidal thoughts. No, I don't hear voices. I have social anxiety people, I'm not crazy! Anyway, so the dr. wanted to know why I haven't been going to counseling and I told him that it makes me uncomfortable. I don't like to be the center of attention. I don't want someone's focus on me. So he asked if I'd feel more comfortable in group counseling and I told him no. He told me that I'm a hard patient to treat. Then, while he was writing something down and I was staring at my feet, he asked me what I was thinking about, so I told him that I was thinking that I couldn't wait to go home. Then out of the blue, he asked me if I lived on a farm. I told him no, but I wish I did because I don't like neighbors. He told me that it wouldn't be a good idea for me to live on a farm. He says he worries about me growing old and secluding myself, so I said that I like to be secluded. I think he didn't know what else to do so he upped my Lexapro and started me on yet another medication. I was reading up on this med, and it's an an antipsychotic. It's for people with schizophrenia, or people with anxiety who cannot be helped with other medications. There's a huge list of side effects, and I'm kind of afraid to take it. I'm going to wait and start it tomorrow night since John will be home. I don't want to take it tonight in case I feel so drugged up in the morning that I can't drive my son to school. One of the side effects is breast enlargement, woohoo! If I could just get that side effect and none of the others then all will be good :)

I was brushing Mikayla's teeth last night and noticed that she has chips out of her front two teeth. They are up close to the gum line. There was a day last week where she fell and hit her mouth. She cried for a short time and I checked to see if she was bleeding but she wasn't. Later on in the day, she mentioned that it kind of hurt to eat. I assumed her lip was hurting her because it looked slightly swollen, and she never mentioned her mouth bothering her again. So, I'm thinking that it had to have happened that day because that's the only day she has cried about her mouth (though she has fallen down dozens of times in the past week). I just can't believe I wouldn't have noticed the chips before. I just feel awful and I feel like a bad mom :(
And for reasons that I don't quite understand, the insurance company dropped Mikayla so she currently has no health insurance and I can't take her to a dentist to get checked out. We have to wait til open enrollment in November to put her back on.

With any luck (though I'm not sure we have any) - John will get a new job. He has an interview tomorrow for a Computer Tech position at Nodaway Valley Bank - here in town! That would be awesome. He mailed his resume on Saturday, and on Monday before noon they were calling him. They had to have just gotten his resume. So that is a good sign. Also, his grandpa used to be vice president of the bank and his grandma used to work there and knows everybody there. John told his grandma on Sunday about applying at the bank, so she probably called and talked to somebody at the bank on Monday morning, lol... It's always who you know... But anyway, even if they offer him the position, there is a chance that they won't pay enough for John to accept it. John makes really good money at the hospital in St. Joe. I'm sure Maryville won't pay as much, and we can only afford for him to take a little bit of a pay cut (just the amount that he would save on gas). So, we are trying not to get our hopes up.